I've recently been convicted of the ways I personally have let the little things go south, you might say, pertaining to Christ and lifestyle changes. It's far too easy to fall temptation to consumerism, complacency, and just losing sight of the Christian vision. Lately I've been stressed out with being a new nurse and the amount of things I have to learn and overcome and I find when I'm tired it's easy to start compromising small things.
Reading the Adventist Frontier magazine, really inspired me, to remember God's calling for my life. And I really do believe that God wants me to go be a missionary in an orphanage overseas for some amount of time. I want to be radical in my walk with God and be willing to give up everything at His request and just leave it all behind.
And yet looking at my some of my lifestyle habits, I have to ask myself if I'm living in a way that I'm preparing to go. Am I preparing to be a missionary or am I developing habits that will be difficult to break? And I know personally there are some changes I need to make and I want to make them.
An article in the magazine called "Invisible Missionaries" says that an invisible missionary is the church member who gives faithfully $10 a month to support local missions; it's the church member who prays without fail every morning at 5am for the Holy Spirit to lead and protect the missionary family in Algeria, it's the missionary who engages in foreign missions by faith and not by sight. What the article is talking about is how to be a missionary when you can't live across the world.
It's hard to be a stateside missionary. And in some ways, I admit, I don't know how to be a stateside missionary. But I want to learn and I want to do better.
I want to learn how to depend on God for my every need instead of my own abilities or asking friends or family.
I want to learn to trust God to provide miracles and small blessings on a daily basic by prayer.
I want my life to look a way that represents Jesus so that people will say "this girl is different".
I want to be faithful financially and a generous giver that supports the ministry of Christ.
These things are so hard. And I know that healthy habits take time to develop and practice. But it is my prayer to start preparing to be a missionary now. And also to be an invisible missionary or a stateside missionary where I am.